If you are worried about confronting the person in private due to fear of the issue escalating, you may want to contact your human resources (HR) department and explain the issue to them. Finally, these groups value interpersonal honesty, exploration, confrontation, heightened emotional expressiveness, and self-disclosure. She holds a BS in Psychology from Virginia Commonwealth University, an MA in Educational Psychology, and a Ph.D. in Counseling Psychology from The University of Texas at Austin. https://medical-dictionary.thefreedictionary.com/therapy. Dr. Letting the other person know that you're listening to what they have to say might help them not become overly defensive. Don’t throw insults or call names and stay away from inflammatory comments. This information should not be considered complete, up to date, and is not intended to be used in place of a visit, consultation, or advice of a legal, medical, or any other professional. When confronting a co-worker, it is especially critical to be armed with facts. Carver has been featured in Austin Monthly, Austin Woman Magazine, Life in Travis Heights, and KVUE (the Austin affiliate for ABC News). Additionally, during your confrontation, try to stick to the issue at hand and don't allow the conversation to veer off course by bringing up past frustrations. Research source. Dr. References. Put your own (and others') safety first. How do you have a hard conversation with family? things about my behind my back. Which of the following Gestalt techniques involves asking one person in a group to speak to each of the other group members? One of the most common characteristics of confrontational and hostile individuals is that they project their aggression to … Yesterday I read in some website that omega-3 can interfere with the drugs I take to treat my diabetes- Is that right? the approach to confrontation. This article helped me approach the matter in a calm and collected way, without further damaging our friendship or hurting his feelings. The goals of a group are often vague. Make sure to assertively tell him to avoid joking about those subjects in the future and finish by asking him if he clearly understands what you told him. Don’t start to throw in other frustrations that you’ve kept bottled up. If it's too scripted, your words won't flow naturally while you're talking, and the other person is more likely to become defensive. "I was having issues when someone who I had previously referred to as a "good friend" was saying nasty. Keep in mind it might not be all their fault. How do you calm yourself before a difficult conversation? For more advice, including how to deal with a defensive reaction from the other person, scroll down. Graded exposure vs flooding Keep in mind that your opinion matters, and being able to speak honestly is worth engaging in an uncomfortable social interaction. Would you be able to find time this afternoon to sit down and have this conversation?”. Don't write out everything you want to say word-for-word. "It was very helpful. For example, you might mention specific days that your colleague came to work late or particular presentations that you feel he or she did not contribute sufficiently to. Take a few minutes to calm yourself—like by breathing deeply or listening to music—before the conversation. I feel much better about confronting people in general, and one specifically. This article has been viewed 127,064 times. Postpone your confrontation until your anger subsides and you can have a rational, factual, and emotion-free conversation. Assess the unique situation. Be sure to state consequences as well if he does not stop, such as cutting off your friendship. Speak to him in private and let him know specifically what kind of jokes you find mean. making the rounds. She was voted one of the Best Mental Health Professionals in Austin for four years in a row by Austin Fit Magazine. [2] The Mayo Clinic research group states that “those with narcissistic personality disorder believe that they're superior to others and have little regard for other people's feelings. She holds a BS in Psychology from Virginia Commonwealth University, an MA in Educational Psychology, and a Ph.D. in Counseling Psychology from The University of Texas at Austin. It can also help to listen to some calming music or anything else that helps you feel relaxed. 3. You learn more about yourself than you would otherwise, and you gain the confidence to express the way you honestly feel. “Elise, I notice that we seem to be butting heads a lot when we meet as a group for our school project. What is the recommended treatment? Think about what you want to say, then write an outline with a few of the key points you want to make. This article has been viewed 127,064 times. Will it matter in the long run if the worst thing you imagine occurs? Carver also completed an internship in Clinical Psychology through Harvard University Medical School. How do I confront him? Thanks to all authors for creating a page that has been read 127,064 times. Confrontation can release you from the burden or tension of a situation. Q. pays attention to the client's nonverbal language. While you may not agree with the point they are making, you should give them the chance to speak their mind. 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